Its almost impossible to describe the feeling. I can barely get myself to crawl to the television to watch another Sox blunder or drag myself to the computer to check updates, scores, or opinions. It many ways its far worse than a playoff loss. Thats a much quicker, more humane way to go out. At least you competed. You met some goal of the season and achieved what most teams did not. Yet this slow, painful plunge from contention to mediocrity and (gasp) eventual early, post-seasonless termination is beyond unbearable. Its bleeding a dawdling, deliberate death with each passing out-of-position/too-many-injury game being another pint of blood lost in the painful path to season ending failure.

I can’t watch. I can’t expose my own eyes to the twinge of witnessing Kevin Youkilis drop a ball while playing left field. Or knowing that Mark Loretta’s last days as a Red Sock might be playing first base. Or watch Manny take another day off because an MRI stated that Manny has just given up while his partner in bat actually had to go the hospital because he was so stressed about losing to the Yankees. I feel like Joe Pesci at the end of Casino watching my brother get pummelled by a baseball bat in a deserted corn field.

And yet I can’t turn away. These are the same guys I have known and loved since April. And with the weather still nice and the NFL more than a week away, I can’t pull myself from the now agonizing depths of baseball mode. Whats worse is that six games back with four still to play against the Yankees doesn’t seem impossible on paper. Yet with one flick of the remote I am engulfed yet again with hopeless despair. In the most critical month of our 2006 season, the Sox have flopped, floundered, and failed their way to a valid pursuit of the worst August record in Red Sox history and a possible third place finish in the AL East. We have been nothing short of abysmal, getting swept by the Royals, the Yankees, and now the Mariners. We have more guys on the DL than in the lineup and our manager is coughing up blood(literally). Its Armageddon in Red Sox Nation with no hope to relieving the excruciating hurt in the weeks ahead. Which begs me to ask the question..

Why do I still believe?

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

I can only imagine what Fenway was like when Papi got up with the winning run on first in the bottom of the tenth. Even though it was just a single by Manny, this just adds to my argument of why you can’t walk Ortiz in situations like this(although I probably would if I were a manager). And thats why they’re the best 3-4 in baseball folks.

All Important Homestand Record: 2-0

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

What I don’t understand is that with a 9-1 lead, Francona had Hansen warming in the bullpen but eventually put in Kyle Snyder for the last inning plus. How does this make sense? Is this not a perfect time to put in designated mop up clowns Seanez and Tavarez? Maybe save everyone else for a close game. Instead Tito puts in our long relief guy(who we have desperately needed to be rested on many occasions) to do mop up work for an inning when Jason “Good for a Few Innings, Maybe” Johnson starts tomorrow. I don’t get it. Of course Synder gave up a dinger to his first hitter. Wonderful.

It can’t be too bad though. A 9-2 win is good in my book any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Lets hope the rest of the stand goes this way.

Really Incredibly Important and Crucial Homestand: 1-0

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

And since these guys have been our studs all year, its impossible to get that upset with them, despite the immense dissappointment and frustration that is caused by getting swept by the Kansas City freaking Royals. I can guarantee this roadtrip will come back to bite us in the ass come September when these Division and Wild-Card races come down to the wire. All three of these KC games were very winnable games. In fact we SHOULD have swept them. These are certainly the games we need to win if we are going to compete for the playoffs.

I know I can’t dwell on the Papelbon blown save or Schilling loss. But its not as if some of the other guys are stepping it up either. I can’t even express to you how bad Tavarez and Seanez are. They are beyond awful and Gawd-awful and have entered the realm of pathetic, incompetent, and utterly futile. Seanez has even been demoted to mopping up the mop up guys. During Tuesday night’s loss to KC, Seanez was forced to play after Francona pitched the kitchen sink the night before. And God forbid he keep the deficit to one run. Instead he allowed a homer in the eigth that prevented the Sox from playing small ball for a run in the ninth when Coco and Papi got aboard with one out. We then had to swing away rather than try to manufacture a single run that would have tied the game had Captain Suck-head(Seanez’s new nickname until I come up with something more creative and mature) actually done the job he’s paid for.

And don’t even get me started with Tavarez. The worst part about him is that on rare occasions he will actually give off the impression that he is worthy and able to pitch in the Major Leagues. Francona, blind by these false ilusions of competancy, will actually play good old Julian in crucial situations. Such as Sunday’s game against the Devil Rays, where Tavarez entered a tie game in the tenth inning. Francona probably envisioned Tavarez pitching a few strong innings of extra-inning relief until the Sox could get a run or two across the board while everyone watching knew that the Sox had essentially conceded the game. Sure enough Tavarez allows a game winning home run to just the second batter he faced. At least he didn’t waste anyone’s time with an artificial front of him actually being capable of doing his job.

Those two guys really are the only Sox players I dislike. In fact I absolutely LOVE this team. They rank up there with some of my favorite Sox teams of recent memory. And despite all the injuries, I 100% believe they can contend with any team in the league. But they are definately in a skid and they need this upcoming homestand to quell any premature notions that this season is beginning to slide away.

It certainly will not be easy. The Sox host pesky Baltimore, Detroit with the best record in baseball, and then the Division leading and eternal rival New York Yankees. If this homestand doesn’t say gut check, I don’t know what does. Pop the Ripped Fuel and turn up the warm-up music folks, its time for our Red Sox to show their huevos.

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

Doug Mirabelli will take on everyday catching duties to replace Tek. Mirabelli is hitting .182 in 30 games with the Sox. As much as Varitek was having an off year, he was entirely more effective than Dougie’s .182. One of the more depressing facts is that Josh Bard, the ostracized backup catcher that struggled mightily to catch Tim Wakefield’s knuckleball and was traded to get Mirabelli back, is hitting .348 with a .420 On Base Percentage with the Padres. Red Sox fans were pratically tortured watching Bard’s futile effort to catch Wake, but no one would argue that he is a better catcher than Doug, and certainly a better bat. Its just another example of how injuries can cause a lot of unforseen problems.

The Sox are going to have to start playing some good baseball during the dog days of August if they want to keep their lead in the East. With the Yankees picking up Abreu and possibly getting Matsui and Sheffield back they could be a incredibly dangerous lineup. I think guys like Wily Mo Pena, Mirabelli, Coco Crisp, and even Alex Gonzalez have to start playing like they have something to prove. With only three reliable starting pitchers and a bullpen built for one inning set-ups, some things are going to have to start coming together.

The Red Sox brought up Ken Huckaby from Pawtucket to back up Mirabelli. Kyle Snyder will also head to the bullpen making Johnson the fifth starter. Francona said this is actually more of a compliment because Snyder will now represent the long relief man the Sox have desperately needed. Since Snyder has only been good for under 5 innings in his starts and some of our starters may need to be pulled early due to ineffectiveness, this is actually a decent move.

Lester goes tonight for the Sox. After CC Sabathia beat the Sox with eight strong innings last night, we could use a win. Maybe just a good old fashioned blow out would be just what the doctor ordered. Well, besides arthroscopic knee surgery.

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

Sometimes it’s difficult to comprehend exactly how clutch this guy really is. Not only do his hits come in critical points of each respective game, they also happen to come at critical points in a pennant run as well. Both Ortiz’s game winning hits this past 72 hours have occurred on the brink of a second place standing in the AL East. The hated Yankees are lingering ominously as the Sox cling to a rickety one game lead. Thank God for Papi or else Red Sox Nation might be digging through the medicine cabinet for that last Zanex or Percoset.

Saturday’s game was an emotional roller coaster. In the fifth inning the Sox were down 6-3 and the Yankees were up 1-0 on Tampa Bay, meaning the Sox 1st place lead would be no longer. But the Sox bats came through tying the game up 6-6 in the ninth while Devil Ray bats clobbered Randy Johnson in later innings. Then Papi worked his magic in the eleventh producing the game winning hit and preserving the BoSox lead in the East.

Sunday’s game was just a disaster as the Sox got spanked 10-4 by the California Angels of the Greater Los Angeles Area or Something. Schilling just plain sucked and we will leave it at that.

Monday saw the return of David “Boomer” Wells and boy was it a sight for sore eyes. Or knees. Or ears. Or whatever. After giving up 8 earned in less than five innings, Kyle Synder came in and actually cleaned up Boomer’s mess by pitching 4+ innings of shut-out ball giving up only one hit. The Sox put two on in the ninth with Gonzalez squeezing out a hit and Kevin Youkilis walking. Loretta popped out and Papi came to the play to deliver a three run shot for the game winner.

This guy is seriously unbelievable.

After Saturday’s game I actually tuned into ESPN radio and heard two of the host debating about David Ortiz. One was saying that in no game-tying or game-winning possible situation could you pitch to David Ortiz. Even if you walked the tying run in by intentially walking Ortiz its better than the alternative. With Big Papi’s resume, its hard to argue. However there are two words in the English language(I think its English) that counter that argument. And they are: Manny Ramirez. So I understand not pitching to Ortiz. Why give him the chance to win the game after he has delivered time after time? The answer is that there is not Papi without Manny. Teams are forced to pitch to Ortiz because pitching to Manny is just as dangerous if not more. Manny’s average is 30 points higher, he has better overall stats(except game winners), and he is possibly the best right handed hitter in the American League. The fact is that if they did walk Ortiz in all of those game winning situations, Manny might have very well delivered himself. Granted the Angels did walk Ortiz in the bottom of the ninth on Saturdays game and Manny grounded out to end the inning and force extras. But get this; Manny has the most Runs Batted In since 1995 of any active player. And he has delivered a few clutch hits himself. Perhaps not 0f the caliber of Ortiz, but maybe that’s because of the opportunities. Also if you want to walk Papi to load the bases, think about this first: Manny has the most Grand Slams of any active players as well. Hmm.

Am I arguing that Manny is better than Papi? Absolutely not. Maybe I think that teams should keep pitching to Papi. Maybe I don’t. Or maybe I just hope they do so I can keep seeing one of the most clutch professional athletes any of us have ever seen keep doing what he does best.

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

I would imagine the Red Sox will probably attempt to make some minor moves but will refrain from making any blockbuster deals. There really isn’t any need to mess with this team that much. Besides the fact that the Sox are in first place, and have been for a while, they are a solidly built team with a great balance of pitching, defense, and bats. However the pesky Yankees are in close pursuits, sitting at about a 2 game deficit but being behind only half a game a little over a week ago. This will probably influence Theo and Co. to at least entertain a deal or two.

The Sox particularly need some assistance at the end of their starting rotation. Wake is on the DL, Clement has been committed, and Wells’s return, although soon(he’s scheduled to start Monday), will be about as predictable as Delmon Young in Sports Authority. And its pretty clear by now that the Sox haven’t found an adequate solution for the 4 and 5 guys. We certainly can’t and won’t go to battle with the Snyder, Johnson, Pauley, Gabbard combo. Some relief help would be nice as well. The set-up crew of Timlin, Delcarmen, and Hansen is satisfactory but can’t be overused. With Javy Lopez good for one batter and one batter only, another lefty would be ideal. It would be even better with we could dump the tweedle dum and tweedle stink combination of Seanez and Tavarez. They have become about as useful as condoms in a convent except for inning killing mop up situations. Plus Tavarez seems about as mentally stable as a drunken pan-handler, making him an added liability in my mind.

The Sox could also maybe use a back-up first baseman to spell Youklis once and awhile. JT Snow would have been perfect had we not released him to open up roster space.

In any event, I would imagine a minor move if any by the Sox come Monday. I wouldn’t glue yourself to your computer, tv, blackberry, or phone for breaking updates but I would keep an eye out. We may have a new Sock or two by Monday’s game. Stay tuned(but not too tuned).

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

One interesting thing to note is that in a radio interview after the series, A’s ace pitcher Barry Zito talked with Bay Area sports radio jockeys at length about how there were more Red Sox fans at the first two Sox-A’s games than there were Athletics fans. Although he felt it wasn’t quite a Fenway atmostphere, Zito said it “definately didn’t feel like a home game” which he felt it should. This is particularly impressive considering the A’s are in the middle of their own pennant run in the AL West. Its one thing to see Sox fans at the Tropicana but its entirely different at a division leader’s home turf. Red Sox Nation in full effect. There were less Sox fans at the day game on Wednesday in Oakland because, well, Boston people actually have jobs.

The Sox came back to Boston yesterday and take on the red-hot Angels of Southern California.

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

I think I was more upset at Terry Francona though. In the 9-4 shellacking of Seattle in the first game, Tito pitched Craig Hansen, Manny Delcarmen, and Mike Timlin in relief for a combined 4 innings. Then with a 3-2 game in the sixth inning of the second game he proceeds to bring in designated mop-up men Julian Tavarez and Rudy Seanez to finish the game, which quikcly became a 5-2 Seattle lead turned victory. Does this make sense to anyone? I understand pitchers need their work but it almost seemed as if Francona had mapped out his pitching schedule before the games started. Not only that but it completely ruined a great start from newly promoted Kason Gabbard, who pitched a ballsy five innings. You would think that with Kabbard and Lester going in the second and third games of the series, Francona would want to save our real relief pitchers for those games. If Beckett was going against Seattle’s number 5 guy in the second game, I might understand the logic, but Tito lost me on this one. Its not like Francona needed to rest guys like Hansen and Timlin for a day either. That clearly didn’t work as Timlin gave up the game winning run in the ninth anyways. And as the perrenial league leader in appearances a year with like a 185 appearance average, its not like Timlin can’t handle back to back games. He shouldn’t have pitched in the first game period. And as far as I am concerned the second game was very winnable up until the point Tavarez entered the game. Good one Terry.

Also I really hate to say anything bad about Jon Lester because he has been absolutely outstanding for us this year. His accomplishments are magnified even greater when you think of how badly the Sox needed a starting pitcher to step in and anchor the back end of the rotation. However, Lester pitched in his home state for the first time in his major league career in the third game of the series and showed his youth also for the first time by letting up 5 runs in as many innings. You would think that Lester would consider the start a big game since it was in front of many of his friends and family. This would suggest that Lester didn’t succeed as much as we would expect of him in a big game. Perhaps I am being too harsh or reading too much into it, but it did remind me of how young and inexperienced Lester actually is. With such a phenomenal beginning to his career, its easy to forget that his major league starts are in the single digits. I am not really worried about Lester but it will be interesting to see how he rebounds after his first unsuccessful outing. He may not have a choice but to do well because with Matt Clement still on the roster, there is only room for one head case starting pitcher. Oh and for the record, David Wells is not a head case, he’s just a nut.

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com

(Lester’s gem was so good in fact that it completely distracted everyone from the fact that we have beaten the Kansas City Royals by only one run the past two games. Yes, thats right. Those Kansas City Royals.)

Believe it or not I am almost speechless. Right after the game ended I quickly went over the facts: Two highly touted prospects combine for a one hit shut-out in their rookie seasons. Game winning RBI driven in by gold-glove caliber short-stop not known for his hitting whatsoever. Yes, I am actually watching a Red Sox game. Was this game not the epitomy of how we have changed this season? It was completely anti-Duquette and anti-Red Sox philosophy of the past two decades. And I enjoyed every minute of it.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I LOVE THIS SOX TEAM! They have to rank up there as one of my favorite Sox teams in the history of Red Sox baseball. As if I wasn’t obsessed enough, this 2006 team has me in love(in a purely non-sexual, masculine, baseball fan kind of way- well except for Gabe Kapler. Who said that?)

A win like this makes you not be able to wait for the next Sox game. Except that Kyle Snyder is probably pitching. Nevertheless, I shall revel in the masterpiece that was tonight. Adios.

theaveragefan@bostonprosports.com